Sunday, April 14, 2019
Day 81: Sometimes You Have to Steal Home
Andrew has had a good weekend. Although clinically he has not particularly improved, He has felt better than he did throughout the week. We’ve had a great time watching the Diamond Dawgs (Thank you ROKU) and he has been able to sit up in the bed throughout the day without having to move from High Flow oxygen to his Bi-Pap machine. He is able to have a liquid diet to the extent that he can handle it. So, he came up with the idea that he could “lick” some cheese dip, ranch dressing, and comeback sauce. His momma is embarrassed but he and I have no shame. He was more satisfied to say the least. However, when the day comes to an end. The processes of changing sheets, getting cleaned, taking meds, and changing clothes routinely brings us all back into reality. Andrew’s lungs are just severely compromised at this point. He simply cannot breathe on his own. He is essentially on the most oxygen he can be given without using the Bi-Pap or a ventilator and he can not maintain his breathe to simply change his shirt. If he has to remove the oxygen source for any reason, then his oxygen levels begin to plummet almost immediately.
The Condition:
What we know is that Andrew as been fighting with two issues this week. First, He has developed a pneumonia of some kind. Secondly, He has a chronic condition of Lung Dysfunction/Disease. More precisely, he has post Bone Marrow Transplant Lung Disease. Basically, his lungs are damaged/diseased from 5 years of fighting leukemia.
What we don’t know yet is how is he going to finish this immediate battle so that he can press on forward to keep fighting his war with Leukemia.
The Good News:
Andrew hasn’t been getting worse. This isn’t a naive sentiment of finding the silver inning. He has been receiving treatment for bacteria and fungal pneumonia and he has not gotten any worse up to this point. This is significant. If it is the case that he is healing himself and these meds are working, then he can recover. It will be an even slower process than what the past 81 days have been but it is genuinely possible.
The Bad News:
The daily limbo of not getting worse but also not getting any better eventually becomes as dangerous as getting worse. If Andrew doesn’t begin to show clear signs that he is getting better in the coming days, then that will be a sign that something is not being treated or being missed. The reason we don’t have more specific information at this point is because doing further testing will be dangerous for Andrew. To be more aggressive with diagnostic testing could turn out to be fatal for Andrew in his condition. If he continues in this pattern of not clinically getting better, then to not do the tests would be to stop #Grindin and quit the fight. The same as giving up!
The New Routine:
So, every morning tests and diagnostics are being done and around 9-10 o’clock we are deciding with the doctors whether it’s time to “steal home” and run the tests. In baseball, stealing home is one of the riskiest plays. Very few can pull it off and rarely is it even tried outside of little league. But, he is either getting better or he is not. If he is getting better, then we give him time to keep fighting. If he is not getting better, then we have to chose to fight for the win or to quit fighting. There is not a test for the doctors to run to tell them that it is time to make that the decision. Experience. Wisdom. Training. God’s gracious guidance. These are all that are left. He will either be getting better or not. If he is not, then we have to chose whether to fight to win or to quit. We have reached that stage of the game. And this much I know, when you have a Jake Mangum on third base or Big Andrew McCall in the PICU bed you steal home if have too. Quitting is not an option. And when you have them in scoring position….you always have a chance. As it is often said in the halls of Batson, “But this is Andrew!”
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